selflove

Moments of comfort are very special and intimate. But I’ll let you in on some of my favorite kinds of moments.

When did I feel most comforted? When you did little things for me that cannot be taken for granted.

I felt comforted when you read my favorite book and talked to me about my favorite character and the story itself.

I felt comforted when you watched my favorite movie and laughed and cried to the scenes when I did.

I felt comforted when you listened to my favorite songs and jammed to them like I normally do.

I felt comforted when you went to my favorite place in town to understand why this place is so special to me and why I were always happy when I spent my time there.

I felt comforted when you stayed up with me until 3am just to let me pour out my heart to you about nonsense and how you still seemed interested and listened.

I felt comforted when you ran your fingers through my hair when I laid in your arms and spoke softly to me because you knew it was all that I needed in that moment. It felt as if every problem has been solved and all my sorrows were taken away and didn’t matter anymore.

After all these things I felt comforted, and I know that behind me there was you and there will always be you.

But you didn’t just give me the feeling of comfort. There are so many other feelings combined with it.

I felt rested when I leaned against your shoulder and closed my eyes.

I felt relieved when you told me that everything will be alright again.

I felt happy when you, my favorite person, just stayed with me.

You were there for me through the heaviest storm and even though you couldn’t change the fact that I was getting wet because of the rain, you cared for me so that I wouldn’t get sick.

In your presence I have given myself permission to be vulnerable. I am going to fall deep, but the landing won’t hurt because you will be there to catch me. You will comfort me.

There is sadness and there is happiness. If you had to choose, what would it be?

Take a deep breath. It’s okay to not be okay, believe me sooner or later you will be.

Sometimes you just have to remind yourself that there is nothing wrong with you. But you think there is and there is a reason for that: you are learning. Each day you are learning something new. You are developing and you will keep on developing even if you are old. And I think this is beautiful.

You are a person capable of change and growth. Your wounds will heal. All it takes is time.

You can use the moments. They are filled with endless opportunities.

Push yourself to go for a walk. Take your headphones with you and smile at strangers that cross your path. Be surprised how many will smile back.

Turn on some music that makes you happy. Start dancing or singing. Just shake off your worries.

Make a list of goals you want to achieve. They could be anything. Anything you want. You can manifest everything. Just keep on believing.

Open your window and smell the fresh air. Breath in and breath out. You see many people. They are happy. They are smiling. Life is beautiful, isn’t it?

Life is all about the little joys. The times when you are with your friends – the ones you can do anything with because they are just as crazy as you are. When you are with your family – the people you can always turn to because they’ll forever love you. When you are with a beloved person – someone you chose to be with because they are everything you have ever dreamed of. The times you were just smiling at the sun and were happy because you truly loved life. The whole world is shining because of your smile. It’s almost magical.

Just do what you love.

Remind yourself of how far you have come.

I asked you, what you would choose if you had the choice. Well, it’s up to you. You can choose happiness because this is about you finding yourself.

I’m not sure what it means to love but I’d like to imagine it like rain.

You may ask yourself why because when we think of the rain, we think of melancholy, but I’ll tell you why.

I have always been someone who took comfort from rain because it was calming to watch it crash against my window. It was exciting to let the raindrops have a race on the glass and it made me happy when my raindrop won. But something changed in me when I went outside. All I wanted to do is going back inside because it started to get very cold, and my body shivered and ached for warmth. So, it has me thinking.

Why did I adore the rain so much when I was inside but start hating it when it poured down on me? When it touched me? Watching from a distance and just admiring it was beautiful. I was innocent and I didn’t know what it would be like touching it, feeling it on my skin.

The rain reminds me of love.

Why am I so afraid of falling in love when I am the one dreaming about being one of the couples in the park? Why do I want to keep love far away from myself? What happens when I lose my heart to somebody?

Maybe I am afraid to get hurt because I have already lost my heart once and it didn´t end well. But just as rain love also comes in different ways.

It can be hard and heavy like the storm.

It can be confusing when the sky changes from blue to grey. Why did the shining sun had to hide behind the dark and heavy clouds?

But don’t forget that it also can be light and soft like the drizzle.

A fresh summer rain is my most favorite thing.

So maybe I got in touch with the wrong kind of rain and another was meant to come its way for me.

Without rain, there can be no rainbow. Something contrary because the rainbow has all these beautiful colors, whereas the rain is just grey, but still it belongs together. Sometimes you have to endure the cold, to see beauty.

But yet I still asked myself constantly: Aren’t we like the rain?

I miss you and the feelings you gave me. I miss the way you looked at me when your eyes were filled with pride and admiration. I miss how you made me smile when I was on my lowest and I miss laughing with you. I miss your voice and the softness in it. I miss the memories we shared and the late conversations we had.

But even though I miss all of it, I still don’t want you back. Maybe I just miss the way I felt when I was with you.

I felt loved. In a way nobody would understand but us. It was a convenient kind of love with no pressure and no rush. A love which made me forget time.

It’s okay to miss people who no longer play a role in your life. It’s okay to miss all those moments, the bad and good. You can still cherish the happiness you felt without wanting these people back.

But why is it that my heart is telling me to hold on, even though my mind has already let go?

Sometimes you have to accept that not everyone is supposed to stay in your life. Some people are sent to give you a lesson. For history not repeating itself. For not doing the same fault twice.

Sometimes you meet people and you’re feeling so connected to them but what if you both needed each other just for a certain time. Just to heal ourselves. And when you are healed the time is over. You’re going to be strangers again, but this time you share a past together with a lot of memories.

And remember: We don’t always lose when we lose.